An artist embarks on a "terrifying musical journey"

Listen to the full audio story
Show Embed Code | Download the MP3

Arts and Culture contributor Melissa Kaplan is a longtime musician currently writing and developing her first one-woman musical. She will detail the ups and down of the artistic process in a recurring feature for Annenberg Radio News.

When I was growing up, I loved bands. After my father bought me my first discman at age 12, stacks of plastic CD cases began crowding my bedroom in Northeast Philly. My first three albums? Live, Counting Crows, and the Eagles' Hell Freezes Over.

Watching the Eagles' reunion tour performance on VH1, my 12-year-old self was enthralled by that inescapable riff in "Hotel California." You know, the one with the duo lead guitars?

I couldn't explain my feelings — I just thought it was the coolest thing I'd ever heard.

I ran over to my dad, who was asleep on the couch in the living room.

"I want a guitar," I told him. He wondered whether this would be a rerun of the piano lessons. “You never practice!”

I insisted this was different, and a month later, I was in one of the back rooms at Jerry's Guitar Shop, where Jerry himself — hanging tough at 80 years old — taught me my first chords.

Pretty soon, I moved on to more advanced techniques and even began taking singing lessons. I started exploring new bands, writing songs, and going to shows.

I followed my musical urges to suburban open mics and backyard parties, loud bars and subway stations.

After years of that, I found myself in a band that really felt like me. We were called The Hard to Get.

This was it! I wasn't just in a band, I was expressing the gamut of my feelings through music. And my favorite part was getting to perform it.

We played in venues all over LA, and explored a world of exotic opportunities all across the U.S. Once, we played in a bar in Tacoma shaped like a teapot.

But somehow, I wasn't satisfied. And it wasn't just the pottery-shaped venues or failing to replicate the same feelings I’d had when I was 12. I was stuck in the role of being a frontperson singing with a guitar. I would write material steaming with nuance that only I could see. I was dying to express more – but I had no idea how.

The band wanted to produce a full-length album and I wanted to evolve, so it felt like a time for a change. After four and a half years, two EPs, and a bi-coastal tour that proved to be very educational, the band parted ways amicably.

Starving for something new, I started watching a lot of YouTube videos of Kate Bush.

Kate Bush is a British musician and performance artist whose work spans decades and draws wide fringe appeal. Think Bjork, before there was a Bjork. An ex and I had discovered the great Kate on a wayward Internet journey in 2006, and she quickly became a running gag in our relationship. Whenever we were in a goofy mood, which was every day, we would make enthusiastic faces at each other and sing Bush’s 1978 breakthrough hit, “Wuthering Heights.”

I went back to Kate Bush because I thought, here's someone who takes risks with her music. Maybe she’ll be able to help me figure this all out. With closer attention, I discovered that beyond the eccentric facade was a vibrant artist and pioneer: the first to use a hands-free microphone, an early adopter of synthesizers, and a storyteller taking us through uncharted territory in her imagination.

I wanted to find the Kate Bush within. I started thinking about my songs, the stories I was telling, and what I wanted to convey to audiences. I remembered being in a stage performance of Hedwig and the Angry Inch several years ago, and how much fun I had had playing a character on stage and singing.

In this production, I was helping tell a bigger story through song. Why couldn’t I do this with my songs now?

I decided to take my experience to the next level: use my songs as a backdrop to perform a bigger story, like a concept album brought to life. I'm calling it a “song-driven narrative.” When I started telling other people what I was doing, they said there was already a word for it. Apparently, I'm writing a musical.

And I have no idea what I’m doing. But in the realm of art and feelings, there are no wrongs, right?

Melissa Kaplan loves performing. She's been playing guitar and singing songs for a whole lot of years, and she's also a professional writer and social media person. Talk to her about anything on Twitter @msculprit.